In my last blog, Kiarra has
Graduated, I shared a link to Kiarra’s testimony (if you have not watched her testimony, I encourage you to
watch it – it’s pretty incredible I must say) where she shared her
plans for college. ‘HER’ plans for college! Well, her plans and my
plans were pretty much aligned. We talked about it quite often and I was
thrilled that she was going to be staying home for two year to attend a local
community college. Not only because I wanted here but because she wanted to be
here as well. For reasons like, watching her siblings grow up, serving in
church and saving money while she figured out what she really wanted for her
future.
The week of June 19th,
she and 20+ other youth from our church headed to Dallas for YFN (the same camp
she talks about in her testimony—seriously, go watch it). Throughout the
week, she heard from the Lord that she should give up her plans and walk with
Him in all ways and that includes college. The plans He has for her
future. Kiarra came back from camp beaming from ear to ear. She shared
with us that evening the plans He has for her that she will attend Christ for
the Nations Institute (CFNI) in Dallas. Because I was in a
room of several people I held my composure and kept it together. I mean, I
can’t be mad that He wants her to attend a bible college. Who can argue or even
be mad with that? I do wish I would have been told privately instead of in a
room with other kids and adults but the message was loud and clear and I know
it was beneficial for others to hear this as well. If there had been time
before hand, I know she would have shared it with us prior to sharing in the
larger group.
So many amazing blessings and
life changes came out of that camp. Over 1000 kids are in attendance each week
of this camp. They have time for worship, time for games and amazing messages
each day. Then, each night the kids from our church and the leaders that
accompanied then, all gathered and shared their experiences from the day. Lives
were saved, futures were determined and their love for the Lord is now stronger
than ever.
Being prepared for this moment
As Kiarra was sharing what He had
revealed to her at camp, I felt an overwhelming sense of calm. The Lord had
been preparing me for this for the past year. Last year after camp, our
youth pastor shared some things with me and from that moment, my heart began to
prepare for this time. Over the past year, I asked Kiarra no less than 3 times
about going away to college. I asked “are you sure you don’t want to be a youth
pastor?” “Are you sure you don’t want to be a children’s pastor?” “Are
you sure you don’t want to be a worship pastor?” Each time, I’d get a
little giggle out of her with a solid NO! I don’t believe I alone held my
composure when she revealed this to us, I KNOW He had prepared me for this
time. Had I of known these plans prior to graduation, I wouldn’t have been able
to enjoy that day as I would have been an emotional mess. Knowing then that she
would be staying home for two years (possibly more) gave me a sense of peace as
I knew I wasn’t moving her out of the house in 3 months. I was able to enjoy
graduation and her party because I knew she wasn’t leaving home for a few
years. I can 100% understand how Moms are so upset during graduation and as
they prepare to send their children off to college. It’s sad, it’s hard, and
it’s now my reality. Although I felt prepared to hear those words, I
wasn’t prepared for the tears I’d shed later that night. Everything hit me at
once. I thought I had 2 more years to pour into her, protect her and walk
alongside her and now that was being ripped right out from under me. Taryn had
a total melt down and I struggled to comfort her as I couldn’t contain the
tears myself. We hugged and we cried and we wiped each others tears. I was
awake most of the night, crying and thinking…and crying more. I prayed and I
cried and I prayed more. I’m not sad for her, I’m sad for me. Selfishly
sad. I am extremely proud of her and so happy for what her future has in
store. I'm going to miss her, a piece of my heart is leaving. I would think
"is this it?" "Is this the last time she'll live with us?"
I already have my answer to that...and I'm satisfied with it.
So now what?
She received a very clear message
during camp that she is to begin CFNI in January. She thought about attending
community college this fall but that would simply be a waste of time and money
as none of the credits would transfer (nothing to transfer to). She will
continue working at TSA this fall and will God willing, will begin at CFNI in
January 2018. She is fulling allowing Him to lead her path on this (how
cool is that – I’m seriously learning so much from this girl). She doesn’t know
which program she’ll complete as she’s waiting for that to be revealed to her.
They have 3 year bachelor programs and all classes are chosen for the students
their first year. Harvey, Kiarra’s boyfriend, will leave for basic training in
August. I believe the Lord has called her to CFNI in January so she’ll be home
to see him off in addition to needing our support during that time.
To finish this puzzle... CFNI is
the college that puts on the camp she has attended the past two year, Youth for
the Nations (YFN). Next summer, she will get to be part of this camp and
leading others to Christ.. (talk about goose bumps!).
Sooo… out with Lone Star
Community College and in with CFNI!!
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